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Thanks to Professional Moron, this batch of manly perfection will make you swoon – dive on in! I deal in moderation as I find this deeply satisfying.Things I do not find deeply satisfying are: expensive holidays, tinned goods, excessive amounts of fun, and demanding women.As a result I’m a bit flabby these days, but I can assure you my staring is top notch creep factor. If you can endure putting up with my manic ADHD, we’ll be sure to get along like a Rottweiler saving a chunk of steak! As with many geniuses, I’m eccentric – I collect marbles which I furtively stuff up my nostrils.
Thusly we have a glorious list of the very best human beings from around the world.
We’ve got a batch of hunky blokes here for you to judge mercilessly as potential boyfriend or husband material.
Being enormously critical and hunting for perfection is what modern dating is all about – the modern woman can do without monobrows, stupid big man feet, burping, and cheesy chat up lines. I am a moderately normal male of moderate height, moderate weight, moderate looks, a moderate sized trouser snake (aka “penis”), and a moderate income.
I am very pretty and perform as a model doing that staring into the middle-distance whilst pouting thing.
It’s what models do and, because I need to be good at it, I spend most of my day practicing that look.
You’ll dig my rhymes just like Rick Grimes, you’ll think I’m hot like a big teapot, you’ll love my words like a load of herds (of cows), and you’ll want to wed me after you’ve bed me! I’m a real CHATTERBOX but I’ve just not CLICKED with anyone ELSE yet.